Waiting Game

I'm ready to have this baby.

It seems like every morning I wake up and my very first thought is, 'Geez... I'm still pregnant,' followed by, 'Damn I have to pee!'

At 34 weeks, I'm really just playing a waiting game. I have a crib ready to go, plenty of onesies and approximately 200 newborn diapers. I even did a load of laundry the other day that was nothing but baby blankets and burp cloths. Her car seat is in the car along with a pull-down window shade to shield her precious baby eyes and skin.

After my baby shower on Saturday, I spent the last couple days doing some intense cleaning. I vacuumed and Windexed my car, which turned out to be much dirtier than I thought. Let's just say I found some interesting things stuffed under the seats and enough half-empty water bottles to bathe in. Afterward, I drove down to the car wash and scrubbed the whole thing down with a lot of help from Mom. For some reason, I felt like it was time for the bumper stickers to come off the back. Where it used to say "Love an Artist," you will now find the words "Baby on Board."

You might say I went into full-on nesting mode. I can't help but wonder if my overzealousness is a result of living in a dorm for so long and not being able to nest gradually.

When I shampooed the carpet in my room the other day, I realized that a small army of roly polies had penetrated the perimeter. Far from the remorse I felt when I genocided a bunch of ants on the porch recently, I sprayed those nasty things down with bug poison and sucked up their corpses into the vacuum without a second thought. Then I went outside my window and killed a bunch more that may or may not have been planning on coming inside.

Why the sudden change of heart for insects? The ants I felt bad about killing were just on the porch- outside, where they belong. The roly polies, however, were way too close to the Baby Zone.

I read in a book that a severe, trance-like urge to nest can be a sign of impending labor, so today I packed my bag for the hospital to have it ready for the big day. In the meantime, I'm looking for any excuse to tackle the small things I haven't thought of yet.

I'm trying to remind myself that once the baby is here, there will be times when I miss my solo life. That being said, I love living in an apartment complex with a nice pool. Feeling gravity leave my poor body for a few minutes is intensely gratifying.

So now you know the plight of a very pregnant young woman. In these last few weeks, you can find me vacuuming, pesticiding, laying like a beached whale by the pool and, as always, eating.