When I reflect on the first half of my pregnancy, I recall the fear I felt in November, the nerves from December, the readjustments in January, and the assimilation to motherhood that has punctuated February. At the risk of sounding cliche, this has been very much a roller coaster ride.
My relationships with the important people in my life have undergone intense changes in the last four and half months. At a time when I thought I would be fully branching away from my family, I need them more than ever. Roy and I are nowhere near where we were in November. These days, my circle of friends has evolved, and even though I miss some old faces, the people who truly want to be supportive and kind are the only ones who remain.
I could probably look back on the last 20 weeks with plenty to say all night, but I would much rather spend my time anticipating the next 20 weeks to come. These are the big ones- literally. Most of the first half of my pregnancy was undetected. I had no problem with people knowing I was expecting, but passers by on the street would not immediately detect the bump unless I was wearing a tighter shirt.
From here on out, the jig is up. As if the bump I have isn't enough, the hot flashes I get during class are enough to let people know that something is definitely going on with me. Wiping sweat from your forehead and fanning yourself with note cards when the weather outside is still 50 degrees or colder is hardly subtle.
I'm beyond excited for the next 20 weeks. If my entire life has been any indication, they're going to fly by. Next thing I know, I won't be typing about pregnancy, I'll be talking about motherhood.
I can't wait to meet her!! Only 20 more weeks!!
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